Here again... and at least this time it isn't past 3am in the morning! I'll be in bed shortly after 1am... mind you, I was last night! Hopefully I can sleep better tonight...
Today has been a pretty average day in terms of my M.E. I admit, I just had to nap before... not surprising considering I didn't get to sleep till 4.30am yesterday morning... The positive is that it wasn't during the evening! I've managed to stay awake this evening...
You know that feeling when you feel you've wasted the day sat at your computer but you continue to do it anyway? That's me today and something I experience more often than I would like. It sends you into a trance... I'm baffled at how much time passes when I'm on the computer - looking at facebook, football news, general news, twitter, blogger, youtube etc etc - How on earth can these things keep me occupied for hours on end? I don't know, but they do!
I think it's so easy to do because you can sit at your computer even with bad brain fog, it doesn't require a high level of concentration - playing songs on loop, general chit chat that your brain is so used to it becomes 2nd nature and you don't have to think about what you say, not only that but computer chairs can be very comfortable... mine is anyway!
I've banned myself from PC games - Whenever I played Football Manager, I literally played it for hours and knew it was doing me no good. Unfortunately, less time spent on the computer means either television or bed... unless you're having a reasonable day and you can leave the house but most of the time these are the only options we have when we're housebound.
What about reading a book? I've tried to start reading more but not only does my head hurt, information tends not to go in after between 5-10 minutes!
I have my singing but again, it's very energy consuming... correct breathing techniques, listening to your own voice as well as listening to the tune can be exhausting, not to mention all the warming up scales!
I find it's a very frustrating vicious circle that we find ourselves in - evening inviting friends round is incredibly exhausting, making conversation, focusing all your energy on your friends is mentally draining.
The only thing really that we can do is to find that fine line, limiting time spent doing all these things. Finding an even balance - spacing it out which is easier said than done.
Enough waffle from me, I have to drop the dog off to be trimmed at 9am followed by a hair appointment at 10.15am - no doubt I'll be needing that afternoon nap!
See you all tomorrow x
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